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What to look for within support groups
A landfill is a toxic environment and that’s easy to discern. There are friend groups that are toxic environments, which become a little more difficult to weed out. And then there are support networks, who’s preface is support, but they really are just trash. How do you weed out these places, people, and networks?
Here are three things to look out for within support groups
1. Language
I’m not talking about the amount or frequency of vulgarities and cuss words. I’m not even talking about whether someone is positive or optimistic (however, I tend to like these traits more). I’m talking about tones and intonations beneath the words. The language someone uses when giving feedback or when they disagree with you: is it productive and creating a reciprocal dialogue or does it shut down and leave little room for dialogue and understanding?
2. Safety
Can you be open and do you feel like you can be yourself? Do these space support you and uphold who you genuinely are? Everyone responds and feeds into your energy differently, but those who are true and supportive are going to hold a space that allows you to feel comfortable in being you, asking questions, and to even make mistakes.
3. Are your concerns validated and acknowledged?
If something concerns you and bothers you, it is always valid and is worthy of acknowledgement. Some issues and concerns are easily and generally accepted as a concern; however,I think we all have issues that we downplay within ourselves. When we open up about that concern, how your support community responds is telling. Do they make space for you? Sometimes people dismiss, downplay, and even manipulate your thoughts and emotions. Which is a huge indicator that that space is toxic, and probably not worth your time and energy.What would you add?
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