Having friends in the CF community makes all the difference to me
Living with a chronic health condition can be isolating, but I feel less alone now
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“I’m freaking out — have you ever had a burst blood vessel in your eyeball?”
This is a recent text message I sent to a dear friend. We’re not only friends; we both live with cystic fibrosis (CF) and have had a double-lung transplant. She gets me on a soul level.
Friendships in the CF and transplant communities have been so valuable to me. For most of my life, I shied away from connecting with other people who have CF, but developing these connections has had a profound impact on me.
The benefit of friendships
These friendships have helped to alleviate anxiety. Friends who have similar health circumstances just “get it.” They’ve had various health complications, quirky medical experiences, and scary events happen to them, too. I don’t need to explain myself; they know what it’s like.
I also feel less alone. Living with a chronic health condition can be extremely isolating. I struggled for years to keep up with my able-bodied peers and friends, only to feel so alone. Knowing I have trusted friends that I can text is a blessing.
We also tend to share the same dark humor. After several near-death experiences, my friends and I speak the same humorous language. It’s helped lighten situations that, to those on the outside, may look bleak or wildly abnormal. Laughter truly does make a difference.
I can check weird symptoms with friends and also share things I’m scared about. Chances are that my friends have had similar experiences. It’s also comforting that they share similar health fears; this helps with navigating the unknowns and combating the heaviness that too many discussions about life expectancy have brought.
My praying friends know how to pray for me. Those with similar health struggles know the specific ways that I need them to pray for me when things get scary. Having friends who share my faith offers opportunities for even deeper connections.
Living with all the nuances of CF and transplant life can be scary and isolating. Most of my friends and family are able-bodied and don’t understand my health fully. So when something wonky happens, like a broken blood vessel in my eye, or there’s some other part of my body that’s falling apart, I know I have trusted friends who have most likely gone through this, too, and may know what to do about it.
We can also relate to each other’s mental health struggles and frustrations with the healthcare system, which are frequent and often stressful, and we’re able to share tips and tricks we’ve learned along the way. We’ve had to carry the weight of anxiety, depression, and medical trauma as a result of living with a chronic health condition, and our individual experiences with CF or transplant life make us experts who can share our wisdom with others.
Most importantly, having friendships in the CF community is a powerful reminder of our shared humanity. Despite the hell that we’ve endured, my friends and I share a similar outlook on life. We tend to live with a greater purpose, want to help others, and are determined to beat the odds. We have a zest for life that can’t be matched, and have deeper relationships and profound life experiences as a result. I’m so grateful for my friends in this community, and I encourage all of you to connect with someone. It’s made all the difference for me!
Note: Cystic Fibrosis News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Cystic Fibrosis News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to cystic fibrosis.
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