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    • #14307
      Jenny Livingston

      On Instagram, Iโ€™ve started a series called Real Talk Tuesday where we delve into the parts of CF (and life in general) that are sometimes difficult to talk about. Join the conversation on Instagram or here in the forum.

      ๐‘๐„๐€๐‹ ๐“๐€๐‹๐Š ๐“๐”๐„๐’๐ƒ๐€๐˜: ๐”๐๐’๐Ž๐‹๐ˆ๐‚๐ˆ๐“๐„๐ƒ ๐€๐ƒ๐•๐ˆ๐‚๐„

      “Try CBD oil. Stop taking those toxic medications. Push yourself a little more. Donโ€™t push yourself too hard! Keto fixes everything. Have you tried meditation? Pray more. Take these vitamins. Drink more water! Have you considered an exorcism?”

      Raise your hand if youโ€™ve heard these (or other) nuggets of wisdom from a well-meaning friend or a total stranger on the internet.

      Receiving unsolicited health advice is a given when you have a chronic illness. We, as humans, have an innate desire to fix things. Unfortunately, that also applies to other humans that we assume are โ€œbrokenโ€ and in need of aid.

      Giving someone unsolicited health advice implies that you know more about their condition than they do, they havenโ€™t done everything within their power to help themselves, and they arenโ€™t capable of researching their options and making the best decision for themselves.

      This is not to say that all advice is unwanted, because Iโ€™ve gotten some great advice regarding my health! The difference is โ€“ sometimes itโ€™s asked for and sometimes itโ€™s aggressively thrown at me without any warning or desire on my part.

      If someone wants advice regarding their health, I promise you, theyโ€™ll ask for it!

      But if you absolutely must share your thoughts on something, there is a proper way to do it.ย For example, saying something like, โ€œHey, If youโ€™d like more info about ___, let me know,โ€ is so much better than, โ€œYou MUST try ___. If you donโ€™t, youโ€™ll be sick forever. Also, CF isnโ€™t even a genetic disease, itโ€™s a mineral deficiency.โ€

      (That last part is something Iโ€™ve actually been told.)

      To you well-meaning friends who just want to help, I know your heart is in the right place. I do! But empathy and sincere questions from you feel so much better than trying to be fixed.

      Friends with CF, how do you deal with unsolicited advice? Whatโ€™s the weirdest advice youโ€™ve been given?

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