Caregiver burnout is taking a serious toll on my mental health
The stress of being a parent, caregiver, worker, and more is overwhelming
After a particularly stressful six months, I hit a breaking point a few weeks ago. I was finding myself constantly overwhelmed by life.
I still feel that way to an extent. School activities, schedule changes, and behavioral issues with my kids send me into a tailspin. Work deadlines haunt me until I finish them. I feel like I’m drowning in responsibility, with very little to offset it. Every night, I collapse into bed wondering if I can face another day of chaos.
Yet, I’m still expected to function every day as a parent, wife, employee, and caregiver to my daughter with cystic fibrosis (CF). All of the different hats I wear make my brain feel like it’s stuck on overload. That level of pressure has caused my mental health to hit a low point.
Lately, my anxiety has been overwhelming me to the point of paralysis. I find myself unable to complete tasks, including writing this column. I’ve been trying to focus on taking things one day at a time, and sometimes even an hour at a time. Despite this approach, I still consistently feel anxious and exhausted.
We are not OK
I’m not alone, though. Parents everywhere are feeling immense amounts of pressure. The U.S. Surgeon General recently issued an advisory about the alarming rise in parental stress. It highlighted that 41% of surveyed parents said they were so stressed they felt they couldn’t function on most days.
Even more shocking, more than twice as many parents and caregivers of children with special medical needs reported “fair or poor mental health” compared with parents and caregivers of children without special healthcare needs. Life as a CF parent inherently comes with more responsibility and pressure.
Unsurprisingly, those extra demands can wreak havoc on a caregiver’s mental health. A review of numerous studies from 2010 to 2020 indicated that CF caregivers reported increased levels of depression and anxiety. Yet, I feel like there is a lack of awareness or discussion about improving caregiver mental health.
I learned more about the importance of mental health support when I was able to attend a cystic fibrosis mother’s retreat in September. There, I bonded with other women over the unique mental health challenges that we caregivers face. Not many people can relate to the level of stress and anxiety we live through on a daily basis while trying to protect our children’s health. We were able to share about all of our struggles in a safe setting. That connected experience alone boosted my mental health.
Another huge thing that happened at the retreat was that I was able to relax for the first time in a very long time. Someone else was in charge of everything. As a caregiver, it’s rare that I can feel responsibility-free. It did wonders for my mental health during this period. Unfortunately, I can’t go on weekly retreats.
Instead, I’m taking smaller daily actions to alleviate my stress levels and boost my mood. I don’t purport to have it all figured out, but I’m trying to prioritize exercise, limit social media, and get outdoors as much as possible. I make a concerted effort to be more present and mindful with my time, especially on the weekends. That way I can go into the week recharged.
I know that life isn’t slowing down. Parenting a child with cystic fibrosis will always mean riding the ups and downs, including as it relates to my mental health.
Note: Cystic Fibrosis News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Cystic Fibrosis News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to cystic fibrosis.
About the Author
Comments