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Good Nervous Butterflies… Know The Feeling?
I couldn’t sleep last night at all.
Like, really couldn’t sleep. It was my second night in a row going to bed at about 3 or 4 in the morning (I was in bed in the dark, mind you, but my brain couldn’t actually fall asleep until then), despite taking melatonin as per usual, and not changing anything major in my routine.
The only thing majorly different is this week and next. My dance company is being honored at the venue of our dreams, and all the details, paperwork, deadlines, guidelines and beyond are racing through my brain.
Do you ever get insomnia from something that is technically… positive?
When was the last time you couldn’t sleep (for days), even though you know it was good stress not bad stress?
I get like this before shows, always. I have to think of every little detail regarding the children, parents and people involved, and can’t seem to turn that wheel off [inside my head] until it’s truly over and done. Then, I celebrate like a wild woman.
Sometimes I think if I did turn my brain off beforehand, major things would go wrong (the amount of things I remember at 3 in the morning are startling). I don’t know why my brain can’t remember useful things by the light of day?
So, whether medical related or just life related: Share the last moment you had consuming butterflies and nerves in your life? What do you do about them? I’d love to know!
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2 Replies
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I’m currently in a no sleep funk as well, but not for the same reasons. I just don’t sleep well these days (something that has gotten significantly worse on Trikafta, even with the use of sleep aids). I’m glad yours are happy butterflies, but sorry that you’re not sleeping well!
While I’m usually one to really lean into my emotions and sit with them, in recent days I’ve turned to numbing or distraction. Certainly not the most adaptive or helpful coping mechanism, but I think it’s okay to do this sometimes. The hours I’ve spent watching Harry Styles videos online may not have a lasting positive impact on my mental health, but I have no regrets about spending the last few days going down this rabbit hole.
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Ah yes, certainly. The mind is blind. It can wind itself up for anything that it feels energized by – positive or negative alike. It’s our job to stay present with that. Just allow the feeling to arise and stay with it without any judgement. Observe it. The mind just wants to be acknowledged, to feel heard. With just a little compassionate attention it is mostly satisfied quite swiftly. It does not require you to get overboard and swept away or hurt yourself on account of it (so only do that if you actually like that). It’s like a little wound up (happy or frightened) puppy. Just talk to it, acknowlegde its energy and wait until it calms down. It will. Then you can go to sleep again. All of this is meditation too.
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