• Self-esteem

    Posted by tre-larosa on February 11, 2019 at 9:47 am

    One of the hardest things I struggle with on a daily basis is self-esteem. I actually don’t know if this is directly due to my having CF or if it’s any number of other things. I think the simplest answer is that it’s a combination of all the above. I wish I had a better answer for how I get through this, but I really don’t.

    1. Do you struggle with self-esteem? Do you understand why? What types of things do you struggle with?
    2. Do you have strategies for working through it? What are they?
    3. Any other thoughts?

    paul-met-debbie replied 4 years, 3 months ago 4 Members · 3 Replies
  • 3 Replies
  • rick

    Member
    December 19, 2019 at 8:40 am

    I have 15 Simple Things to Do to Raise Your Self-Steam:

    1. Master a new skill.
    When you become skilled in something that corresponds with your talents and interests, you increase your sense of competency.

    2. List your accomplishments.
    Think about all the things you’ve accomplished, then write them down. Make a list of everything you’ve done that you feel proud of, everything you’ve done well. Review your list when you need a reminder of your ability to get things done and to do them well.

    3. Do something creative.
    Creative tasks are a great way to put the flow back into your life. Creativity stimulates the brain, so the more you use it, the greater the benefits. Pull out your old guitar, write a story or poem, take a dance class or sign up for a community theater production. When you add the challenge of trying something new, it helps you even more.

    4. Get clear on your values.
    Determine what your values are and examine your life to see where you’re not living in alignment with what you believe. Then make any necessary changes. The more you know what you stand for, the more confident you will be.

    5. Challenge your limiting beliefs.
    When you catch yourself thinking negatively about yourself, stop and challenge yourself. Don’t let yourself be limited by erroneous beliefs.

    6. Stand at edge of your comfort zone.
    Stretch yourself and move to the edge of your comfort zone. Get uncomfortable–try something new, meet different people or approach a situation in an unconventional way. Confidence begins at the edge of your comfort zone.

    7. Help someone.
    Use your talents, skills and abilities to help others. Give someone direct assistance, share helpful resources or teach someone something they want to learn. Offer something you do well as a gift to someone.
    Especially I will appreciate your help if you check my new article about bitcoin trading.

    8. Heal your past.
    Unresolved issues and drama can keep you trapped in low self-esteem. Seek the support of a trained counselor to help you heal the past so you can move onto the future in a confident and self-assured way.

    9. Stop worrying about what others think.
    When you worry about what others will think of you, you never feel free to be completely yourself. Make a firm decision to stop worrying about what other people think–begin making choices based on what you want, not what you think others want from you.

    10. Read something inspirational.
    A great way to gain more self-esteem is to read something that lifts you up and makes you feel positive about yourself.

    11. Reclaim your integrity.
    Define what integrity means for you, and ensure that you’re living in accordance with that understanding. If your life isn’t aligned with your character, it will drain you and leave you feeling bad about yourself.

    12. Let negative people go.
    If there are people in your life who are negative–who have nothing positive to say or who put you down or take advantage of you–do the smart thing and let them go. The only way to find your self-esteem is to surround yourself with supportive positive people who admire you and value you.

    13. Draw a line in the sand.
    The best way to find your self-esteem is to create personal boundaries. Know what your boundaries are and how you wish to respond when people cross them. Don’t allow others to control you, take advantage of you or manipulate you. To be confident is to maintain firm boundaries.

    14. Care about your appearance.
    When you look your best, you feel your best. Dress like someone who has confidence and let your self-assurance come through in how you look.

    15. Define success.
    Clarify what success means to you and what it means in terms of your confidence. If you really want to do something you will have to find the self-esteem within yourself to just do it.

  • melanie

    Member
    December 21, 2019 at 9:44 am

    Hi Tre
    Scott (Melanie’s husband) here.
    Yes… 100%. I can go from feeling ‘on top of the world’ to feeling low-confidence, depressed, worthless, etc. the next morning.
    For me… I felt the worst when I was laid off from work for 6 months.
    I think that we all need to feel as if we have a purpose. For some it might be to work or to provide for others. Regardless of what it is it is important that you feel fulfilled. I believe that what fulfills us changes throughout life… so I am not surprised to hear stories of people making big changes in their lives ‘out of the blue’. Therefore I think it is good to feel these ‘bad’ feelings (including low self-esteem) because it is our inner self telling us that it wants a change. However I think that it is detrimental to allow one-self to remain ‘down in the dumps’ for long periods of time. If you find yourself in this situation please reach out to others that love and/or care about you to help lift you up (we all need someone to lean on!). Also seeing a psychologist is never a bad idea… even if it is a 1 time thing here and there.
    Good luck and Take care
    Scott

  • paul-met-debbie

    Member
    January 1, 2020 at 2:33 am

    Just be your natural self. Nature doesn’t need esteem, it is innately complete. Self esteem is a concept of the (modern western) mind. Get rid of it, it’s a prison and a treadmill. Does a flower need self esteem, or a bird? It’s just naturally flowering and birding, doing a great job without doing. Stop doing and trying and stop even that, just Be. Act according to sponteneity and intuition. Listen to your body. When hungry, eat. When thirsty, drink. When tired, sleep. Live the life, don’t think it. You will be amazed of the potential unleashed. Be a great life, not a great person. Don’t complain or compare, comply. Be free.

Log in to reply.