Processing My Pain Was Necessary for Me to Heal from Years of Hurt
In the days after I got new lungs, I’d pray for the healing to move faster so I could get on with life. I’d stand in front of a mirror and…
Victorious — Brad Dell
Brad Dell is Deaf and was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis at 2 months old in 1993. He received a double-lung transplant from UC San Francisco in January 2017, then cochlear implants nine months later. He lives in Hawaii, where he was raised. Usually he’s traveling the world, chugging coffee, or devouring books. He also pastors Restoration Community Church and serves as the director of community content at Bionews, this site’s publisher.
Featured Post
From kicker to hand-holder: Being brave despite cystic fibrosis
As a child I was a kicker, the type no nurse wants to be near when wielding needles and throat swabs. Eventually I’d relax my shrieking when Mom or Dad held my hand and…
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Clinical Anxiety of an Unexpected Type
Hi, my name is Brad Dell, and I have clinical anxiety disorder. Well, disorders. Three types. My generalized anxiety disorder is well-documented in my columns. It’s plagued me since sixth grade, beginning when…
We Don’t Get Used to Disease, So We Still Need Your Support
Bradley was a dramatic kid. I’d sit up in bed at night, unable to lie down because it made me cough, and wonder whether Prometheus ever became used to having his liver pecked…
Why Rare Disease Communities Must Stand United
“You need space at the table for five wheelchairs?” The waitress’s eyes exploded from her skull, shocked to the degree I’d expect if I were to…
Are Anger and Fear Villains, or Must We Acknowledge Them to Thrive?
It’s been almost three years since a port-a-cath infection nearly killed me. A fungal infection invaded my bloodstream and attempted murder, shutting down my organs and blasting me into a dimension of hallucination…
Screwed Over Expectations, Pura Vida, and a New Normal
I was fully deaf, too weak to walk across my living room (I couldn’t reach my upstairs bedroom anymore), constantly coughing and vomiting, soaked in sweat and wheezing, too anxious to face friends,…
In Cystic Fibrosis Awareness Month, I Look Back to Anticipate the Future
The night I received my first Hill-Rom Vest — at age 5 — was a fun one. It was a beast of a machine in the mid-1990s, a white box weighing maybe 50…
Here’s What It Feels Like to Have Cystic Fibrosis
There’s a rattle in my chest when I inhale. I sweat and dig my nails into my palm. I feel it, microseconds of dread and fear as the rattling gives way to something like…
Why I Shout My Story
A dad at the church I attend came up to me and said his newborn daughter had been diagnosed with cystic fibrosis. He looked tired; his motivation for telling me was mostly…
The Scenes in ‘Five Feet Apart’ that Tore My Heart
Heard enough about “Five Feet Apart” yet? I know you’re begging to read just one more piece about it, right? I saw the movie about a week after its release and wasn’t…
‘CFer’ or ‘Person with CF’? I’m a CFer and Proud of It
Note: I do not write on behalf of the entire CF community. No one does. This is about my preference. The most amusing, yet irritating, thing a person without chronic…
I’m Getting Better at Detecting Depression’s Creep and Shooing It Away
I shoulda seen it coming. (That’s what I always say in hindsight, once it hits.) Maybe I shoulda known when five people at church told me I look “really, really tired.” Perhaps…
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