Columns

Why My Service Dog Is Staying Home

COVID-19 has uprooted my life in many ways. Some are obvious, some are not. Like many people with disabilities, I have been in isolation since the outbreak began. Shortly after, an interesting topic came up among service dog handlers: Is it safe to use service dogs during this…

Let’s Unite to Ditch the Charade of ‘I’m Fine’

Confusion over how we “should” react to suffering wreaks havoc in the mind, often triggering a shame response. We so often utter the words, “I’m fine,” though that performative response is far from the truth. Inside, we cry out for help. The cultural norm’s expectation is to function without our…

I’m a Dancer but I Can’t Walk Right Now

My body doesn’t work. This isn’t new information. But every time I get new information about a new way it doesn’t work, I feel a surge of emotion. “I think I’m sort of depressed today,” I told my partner, after a long morning of telehealth and treatments. “I just…

How Dying Taught Me to Live

His little ribs rose, then fell, then rose, then fell, then stayed still. The spark left his green, curious eyes — I swear it wasn’t a trick of the light. They were dull … dead. I loathed myself for letting my first cat be put to sleep without me by…

Has the Face of Cystic Fibrosis Changed Forever?

It’s Cystic Fibrosis Awareness Month, and I’m not aware of what that means anymore. I remember the first time I told someone I was being examined for cystic fibrosis. “You don’t look like you have CF,” she said. “They have a certain look.” She was a nurse who’d been through med…

The Story Behind Awareness

Each time I meet someone new, CF pours from my mouth. It has become impossible to negate that intricate piece of who I am. Cystic fibrosis isn’t my whole life, but it has evolved me into the person I am today. May marks Cystic Fibrosis Awareness Month. In…

How to Be Forgotten in 800 Words or Less

By the time you finish reading this, you’ll have forgotten me. I worry about being forgotten more than I should. I’ve lost countless friends whom I remember at odd times and think, “Wow, I haven’t thought about them for so long.” I remember random celebrities like Jennifer Garner and…

Stuck Between Nostalgia and Reality

“I love the smell of napalm in the morning,” said Lt. Col. Bill Kilgore. He proceeded to describe bombing a hill, and how the resulting carnage “smelled like victory.” He then frowned and said sadly, “Someday this war’s gonna end.” Kilgore serves as the war addict archetype for the…

Stop Making Yourself Sick About Other Sick People

I have written about many subjects, but I’ll never stop writing about one: Why are we hateful of someone else’s body? The internet is full of trolls. We shouldn’t give them more credence than we already have, but the worst kind of troll is a chronically sick one who believes…